Posted by: libbith | July 11, 2009

(Almost) Final Saturday

This is where I get really honest.  I’m sitting on my couch right now with elephant tears streaming down my cheeks.  Why? Really, no good reason.  I could blame some silly stresses in my non-athletic life, but those are just excuses.  What is actually going on is that, every week, after the high of my Saturday workout is over, I crash…HARD.  I always feel pretty incredible after our Saturday workouts, because they are some of the hardest and I haven’t worked all day before them.  I, therefore, can push myself further and feel more accomplished than after most work-week practices.  As the day progresses, however, the fact that I woke up before the sun and worked out for 2-3 hours starts to set in and I get exhausted.  And crabby.  And irrational.  And it isn’t fun.  I hate this about the training because it ruins half of my weekend and makes me mean to those around me (read: my boyfriend).

Fortunately, today was the last hard Saturday workout.  We still have a swim at Coney Island next weekend (the last one resulted in a pretty nasty me for a few hours), but at least that isn’t as strenuous, just early.  Not only was it the last, but it went really well.  So, while it didn’t calm all, or any, of my anxiety about the race that is now only two weeks away, it made me know that, barring disaster, I can actually do this!

So, that brings me back to the tears that clearly shouldn’t exist right now.  This is fun.  And I am enjoying this.  So I don’t want the benefits to be minimized by my moods.  Considering I really do hope to continue this sport and learn to train better and earlier in the morning, I have to figure out how to get over this.  Whether it is learning to hide my moods better or learning to not let my exhaustion so dictate how my day goes, I have to figure it out.  It isn’t fair to me, and it isn’t fair to those around me.

Advertisements

Responses

  1. libby, you are so ‘hard’ on yourself. but, you already know that. this challenge has got to be, not only physically and mentally taxing on your body, but chemically taxing, as well. hence, the extreme highs and the lows. you have already come so far on this journey. you are amazing, and such an inspiration to so many. and…, all the contributions you continue to raise for such a worthy cause are so wonderful.
    and…. don’t forget take some ‘shopping breaks’ along the way. :)sue

  2. Hi Libby! I have done 5 International distance tri’s and the NYC Tri will be my 6th. I often feel the same way as you do when training. WHY am I doing all this instead of relaxing, reading a good book or the NY Times on a weekend morning?! I honestly don’t know..but doesn’t it make you feel like a warrior? You need to rest up as much as you can and treat yourself each workout day to something for your hard work. A leg massage, ice cream, new lipstick, whatever makes you feel wonderful! I like to think about how great I’ll look and how much I’ll be enjoying a post-race meal!

  3. Sue: Thank you so much for your words of encouragement, it really means a lot to me! And I definitely plan on some shopping when this is all over.

    Gabrielle: Thanks for reading and commenting! I certainly do feel like a warrior, especially when it is 9:30am and I’ve done more in my day then most people will do all weekend! Just trying to figure out how to continue to do this sport while not sacrificing the happiness of myself and those around me. Good luck on the 26th! We will have to compare notes after.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Categories

%d bloggers like this: